A husband and wife go visit a marriage counselor. First, the wife speaks to the counselor alone. The counselor asks, “You say you’ve been married 20 years, so what seems to be…

An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset. Upon making several false alarm trips to the…

A woman in her eighties made the evening news because she was getting married for the fourth time. The following day she was being interviewed by a local TV station, and the…

During a dinner party, the hosts’ two little children entered the dinning room without clothes and walked slowly around the table. The parents were so embarrassed that they pretended nothing was happening…

A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, “Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome…

Bill and Bob, two children, were sitting outside a clinic. Bill happened to be crying very loudly. “Why are you crying?” Bob asked. “I came here for a blood test,” sobbed Bill….

Three very macho mice are standing around trying to outdo each other. The first mouse says, “You know those little pellets they put out around the house trying to poison us? I…

A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him. “Why do we have to learn this stuff?” one young man blurted out….

Following a woman with a dog out of the movie theater, a man stopped her and said, “I’m sorry to bother you, but I was amazed that your dog seemed to get…

A new man is brought into Prison Cell 102. Already there is a long-time resident who looks 100 years old. The new man looks at the old-timer inquiringly. The old-timer says, “Look…

A medical student walks into his favorite local bar and orders a beer. “I’ve finally decided what my practice will specialize in,” the student tells the bartender. “It will be in the…

Two multimillionaire friends met up for lunch and started chatting. “So how’s your home life?” asks the first multimillionaire. “Couldn’t be better,” replies the second multimillionaire. “I bought an elephant!” “An elephant?…