Burford is checking out of a hotel when suddenly he has to take a sh*t real bad. The toilet in his room isn’t working, so he bolts down to use the lobby…

The only seat available on the train was directly adjacent to a well dressed middle aged French woman and the seat was being used by her dog. The weary traveler asked, “Ma’am,…

This lady is having a bed wetting problem, so she decides to go to the doctor. The doctor tells her to go and get undressed and wait for him in the other…

A farmer hires a college student one summer to help around the farm. At the end of the summer the farmer says, “Son, since you have done such a fine job here…

A man walks up to the bar, and speaks to the bartender. “I bet you $500 that I can piss in this cup from across the room.” The bartender looks at the…

This man is walking down the road and hears someone crying. He stops and looks over the fence and sees a woman without any arms or legs crying beside a pool. He…

A priest was taking a shortcut through an alley one day and came upon a young boy who was masturbating. “My son, you shouldn’t be doing that,” said the priest. “You should…

Tom was in Las Vegas gambling and having a run of bad luck. He lost all his money and was now waiting for his bank to wire him some more. He was…

There is that married couple. They were together for more than 20 years. One day woman rushes into her house one morning and yells to her husband, “Sam, pack up your stuff….

A guy is riding the bus when at a stop, the most beautiful woman he has ever seen gets on. The only problem is that she is a nun. He decides to…

Two guys and a girl were sitting at a bar talking about their lives. The one guy said, “I’m a YUPPIE. You know, Young Urban Professional.” The second guy responded, “I’m a…

A man and a woman were having drinks when they got into an argument about who enjoyed sex more. The man said, “Men obviously enjoy sex more than women. Why do you…