A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she…
Our Smart Bob
When Bob found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So one evening he went to…
A Different Monkey Business
Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10 each… The villagers, seeing that there were many monkeys around,…
Give Me A Compliment
A woman after a shower and looking at herself carefully in a mirror before getting dressed. She says: ‟Oh Dear! Jake, look at me. I am old and wrinkly, my teeth look…
My Wife’s So Beautiful
A man sitting next to me on the bus today showed me a picture of his wife from his cell phone. He says to me “Isn’t she very beautiful”? I replied to…
They Are Finally Together
A woman marries a man and has 10 children. The man dies, so the woman remarries and has 10 more children. The next man dies, so the woman remarries again and has…
A Shocking Answer!
Do you mind if I sit beside you?” The girl replied with a loud voice, “NO, I DON ‘T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!” All the students in the library…
Turkey? What Turkey?
A game warden was driving down the road when he came upon a boy carrying a wild turkey under his arm. He stopped and asked the boy, “Where did you get that…
A Man With His New Guard Dog
A guy and his dog walk into a bar. The guy orders a beer and the dog flops down on the floor and immediately starts licking its b*tt. “This is my new…
Your Dress’s Blowing Up
Old lady on a cruise… The old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind….
Three Vampires
The first vampire tells the other 2 “Hey! I have an idea! Let’s have a competition between the three of us to see who is the best at sucking blood!” Since they…
I Am Allergic To Nuts
Man and woman are out on a dinner date. Waiter: “What will you be having tonight ma’am?” Woman: “I’ll have the salad, no nuts please.” Waiter: “Of course.” Man: “But it didn’t…