Four high school boys afflicted with spring fever skipped morning classes. After lunch they reported to the teacher that they had a flat tyre. Much to their relief she smiled and said,…
A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a rifle. “It’s for my husband,” she tells the clerk. “Did he tell you what gauge to get?” asked the clerk. “Are…
One day, finding a wasp had entered the house, a wife shouted to her husband, “There’s a wasp in here. Do we have any spray?” He told her there was a can…
A grandmother was pushing her grandchild around Wal-Mart in a buggy. Each time she put something in the basket, she would say, “And here is something for you, Diploma,” or “This will…
A woman goes to a psychiatrist and says, “Doctor, you’ve got to do something about my husband — he thinks he’s a refrigerator.” “I wouldn’t worry too much about it,” the doctor…
A man parked his car at the supermarket and was walking past a row of empty shopping carts when the cart-girl standing there called after him, “Excuse me, did you want that…
A man walked into a bar, sat down, ordered a beer. As he sipped the beer, he heard a soothing voice say, “Nice tie!” Looking around he noticed that the bar was…
A young man excitedly tells his mother he’s fallen in love and is going to get married. He says, “Just for fun, Ma, I’m going to bring over three women and you…
A motorist, after being bogged down in a muddy road, paid a passing farmer $5 to pull him out with his tractor. After he was back on dry ground he said to…
A man bought a new fridge. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying “Free. You want it you…
A man told his doctor that he wasn’t able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, “Now, Doc, I…
A couple went on vacation to a fishing resort up north. The husband liked to fish at the crack of dawn while the wife preferred to read. One morning the husband returned…