“My little son is too sensitive,”`A said a mother bringing him to school for the first time. “Don’t worry! We’ll take care of him,”`A said the teacher. Added the mother, “If he…

A man goes to a shop and asked how much the eggs were. “Sixty cents for the small, 70 cents for the medium, 90 cents for the large and 30 cents for…

Sitting at the bar, sad Rob told the bartender that he was drinking to forget the heartbreak of his broken engagement. “Yeah,” said Rob, “would you marry someone who didn’t know the…

A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some friends when the subject of marriage counselling came up. “Oh, we’ll never need that. My husband and I have a great…

A man goes to the doctor with a swollen leg. After a careful examination, the doctor gives the man a pill big enough to choke a horse. “I’ll be right back with…

Two professors of mathematics were staring away at the flagpole in front of the college building. A professor of physics walking by asked, “What seems to be the problem?” “We were wondering,”…

Four high school boys afflicted with spring fever skipped morning classes. After lunch they reported to the teacher that they had a flat tyre. Much to their relief she smiled and said,…

A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a rifle. “It’s for my husband,” she tells the clerk. “Did he tell you what gauge to get?” asked the clerk. “Are…

One day, finding a wasp had entered the house, a wife shouted to her husband, “There’s a wasp in here. Do we have any spray?” He told her there was a can…

A grandmother was pushing her grandchild around Wal-Mart in a buggy. Each time she put something in the basket, she would say, “And here is something for you, Diploma,” or “This will…

A woman goes to a psychiatrist and says, “Doctor, you’ve got to do something about my husband — he thinks he’s a refrigerator.” “I wouldn’t worry too much about it,” the doctor…

A man parked his car at the supermarket and was walking past a row of empty shopping carts when the cart-girl standing there called after him, “Excuse me, did you want that…